This week is the ‘meeting of photographer’s week’. When Adam and I first got engaged I started sourcing photographers right away; it’s a business that I love keeping up with and am totally interested in (don’t get me wrong I’m not interested in becoming a photographer, I just like photography) so I jumped at the opportunity to show Adam all the photographers I had been keeping up with over the past few months.

I have been following Jasmine’s Star’s work for about 10 months now, and LOVE her. Honestly, love her and her work. Maybe its her personality that attracted me to her, or the fact that the California sun is so forgiving that it makes every.single.one of her shots look amazing, but I am completely captivated by her work.

These are the shots that sold me - I wanted to be that bride, I wanted to be in that photograph.

Even though she’s from California we contemplated flying her up for our wedding. However, we quickly realized we weren’t made of money and that no matter how much we loved her photographs she was someone we couldn’t have. Yes, my heart sank at the thought, but that’s reality.

I then began my search for photographers that were closer to Vancouver that had a similar style to Jasmine; a photographer that tugged at my heart, where I wanted to jump into their photographs. Months before Adam and I got engaged Chris sent me a link to Jamie Delaine and told me he liked her style of photography. I had seen her comments on Jasmine’s blog so I knew she was someone after the same style of images that I was. I emailed her, I swear 3 days, after getting engaged.

Last night we met up with her and found her to be the sweetest person ever. The first thing I noticed was she had a similar eye shape to me; they close when we smile, it made me like her even more! Adam and I warmed up to her immediately while discussing our itinerary for the wedding , all the technical questions that Adam had, and all the design and product related questions I had. Adam loved the fact that she had all the right answers to his questions (and the fact that she has impeccable grammar), and I loved the fact that she got all excited about the same things as I did (graphic layout, business cards, and product design).

Even though she’s younger then most photographers out there, I love the fact that she knows what she wants and she’s going after it, and its working for her. She is shooting a wedding this coming weekend, and I can’t wait to see the slideshow from her.

Here are 2 photos that I like….the last one are old church friends, it was fun seeing photos of them…

We’re meeting with two more photographers tonight. One is Ellen from Hong Photography. I really like her style as well. It’s photo journalistic as well she has experience in fashion shoots and I think it would be so much fun to take fashion style photographs at our wedding (considering we’re going to be all dressed up and all).

I liked this photo mostly because the model has red hair and fair skin - just like me! Ellen obviously has wedding photos as well, but I wanted to showcase this one.

The next photographer were seeing tonight is someone I went to high school with, who contacted me after seeing my blog. It’s going to be fun reuniting with her after so many years of not seeing each other. Her style is very similar to another photographer we contacted out of Seattle but found that their starting packages were completely out of our budget. Here is a photograph that Christine from Bluehaze Photography that makes my heart do a little jump.

I can’t wait to meet all these wonderful photographers, it just sucks that we have to decide on one for the day….I wish I could have them all.

I sent in my portfolio for my submission for the full-time program; and I can’t wait to hear back. I’m trying my hardest not to think about it and to let my self get caught up in the anticipation - and so far so good.

Because to be completely honest; I won’t be heart broken if I don’t get in. Yes, I’ve worked my butt off this past year that it would be pretty devastating to find out I wasn’t good enough; but I’m looking at it from another perspective and that perspective almost looks better then being in school full-time. Yes, the grass always looks greener then where you stand, and sure I might be looking at the other side through tinted glasses so I don’t understand the full scope of it all - but I know it’s there, and it looks mighty fine.

Even as I sit here now I know I should be working on the homework I didn’t do last week, but instead I’ve been doing internet searches and designing my business cards (that have been in the works for 8 months now). My mind has been racing, my stomach is turning with excitement, and I feel exhilarated because I know something that I’m envisioning could be with in my grasp.

But I guess both paths are within my grasp - I really just have no inclination which one I desire more. Because by this time next year I could be a certified Interior Designer as well; and thats pretty darn cool.

I attached the card I’ve been working on…sorry it isn’t very good quality.

Have you ever woken up one morning and thought to yourself “Holy Crap….I’m screwed!”??

I have, and I did it again this morning.

I planned and did so much for our party (which was fabulous, and thank you to everyone who came out) that I neglected my homework all week, and now have nothing to show for my class tonight!  Yikes!  I’ve never done this!

And this week isn’t any better!

I might be pulling some all nighters next week to get my project completed on time….I just hope I do a good enough job to pass…. :S

It also made me realize that planning our wedding as well as going to school is going to hard to do.

Things are going well.

Life is busy; I’m still in school, but hardly ever think about it (oh, how its going to come and bite me in the butt soon), we’re planning our wedding one baby step at a time, and we’re planning our engagement party for this Saturday (full force I must say).

When we first started planning our party I felt so overwhelmed. Thoughts of “how are we going to pull this off?”…. “are people going to understand what we’re doing?”….. “I hope they like it” all came rushing into my head. I started to become stressed by the pressure I was putting on myself to throw a good party.

Sometimes I feel an overwhelming amount of pressure to design great things because it’s something people expect since I’m in design school and really into design. But the truth of the matter is, I feel like I’m the last person who knows what they are doing.

At first, I was afraid to make a move or to make a decision. But eventually I let go, and it felt good. I let my intuition take over and became inspired; I started pulling images from my stash of photos and created something I was excited to see come together.

Over the weekend I started hitting up stores and people’s houses to get stuff to help it all come together and by the end of the day I couldn’t believe how well it all worked and how energized I was for it all. I couldn’t wait for everything to be polished and set up.

I can’t wait to see the room come together on Saturday, one of our friends offered to take photos during the night, so hopefully he gets some good shots of the room that I can post to show you how it looked.

That includes a mountain of school work!

Adam, his parent’s and I are off to Tofino tonight to attend a wedding at the Wickaninnish Inn over the weekend.  When we received the invitation that the wedding was going to be in Tofino I was so excited; the cold beach, the westcoast rain forest, a 99.9% chance of rain - its such a dear place to my heart.

When I lived on the island, my friends and I would jump in a car and do day trips out there.  Sure it would take 2+ hours to get there, but once you drove down the Trans Canada Hwy, and come to this spot where you see the waves hitting the beach through the trees - it takes your breath away.

I haven’t been there since I took a vacation there with Chris in 2006.  I can’t believe its been 2 years, considering how often I used to go, it astounds me.  We traveled up there with my friend Bliss, we learned how to surf, stayed in a B&B that wreaked of weed, went to a dirty pub that had horrible karaoke, and where Chris started talking about how he wanted to purchase a better camera so that he could take professional photos.  He defiantly took the best photos from the trip - my camera battery died after the first hour.

I’m so excited to be going to a place that is so laid back, full of surfers, and surrounded by the beach and trees.  I just hope I get to enjoy it.  I hope I get a surfing session in, take a walk through the rainforest, and tour the itty bitty town.

I hope that my project doesn’t swallow me whole and steal my time away.  I hope.

Chris and I surfing in 2006, photo taken by Bliss

We’re booked!

June 20, 2009 is the big day.

The Vancouver Club.

I’m so excited I could pee my pants.

I’m frustrated by this.

I can’t think properly, I have too much on the brain. I haven’t been able to post anything because I feel uninspired by all the other boring distractions running around in my head. I ask how can I be uninspired when I’m constantly looking for inspiration? I find inspiration daily, but it’s quickly forgotten because my mind shifts gears as quickly as the inspiration hits.

I’ve become horrible at responding to emails. I hate that this has found a home within me. I read the emails, think to myself I need to reply to them, and think I’ll do it at a later date but find that weeks later I still haven’t replied. If you’ve emailed me and I haven’t responded….I’m so sorry.

I’m finishing another major school project as well as finishing my portfolio which are due within two days of each other is causing a little stress. The fact that we’re going to a wedding in Tofino this coming weekend (which I’m looking forward to) just before my assignments are due, stresses me out. A LOT. It’s my fault I put off the portfolio for so long, but I work best under pressure. So now I’m stressed.

We’re trying to find a venue to host our wedding reception at for next summer. This is one of the most frustrating parts of my life lately. We found a venue that we’ve fallen in love with; it made us happy and giddy when we walked in and saw how beautiful it was. It was hard for me to contain my excitement about the venue and hold my composure in front of the catering representative, but I did; which I’m sure Mister was thankful for. We instantly knew that this was the venue. The only hiccup, we’re now trying to find a member of the venue. Anyone know a member of The Vancouver Club who would like to sponsor our wedding there? We’re hoping that some of our contacts might know someone….but we’re playing the waiting game to hear back from them. I’m trying not to get too excited, but its hard to hold it all in when it feels so right.

So to summarize: Too much is going on, my brain is full. I’m frustrated, and I can’t concentrate.

Back in the day Sarah wanted to host a BBQ reception for her wedding.  When she told me, I thought “You’re crazy, but how adorable and different”.  Sometimes people can get so caught up in having to put on such a lavish affair or out-doing the previous weddings they’ve attended that they forget about the different, off-beaten path type of weddings that could be so innovative and charming to anyone who attends.

So since Sarah is taking it slow in the planning process, I thought it would be fun to put an inspiration board together for her and remind her how she wanted to throw a ‘traditional’ hot dog and hamburger style BBQ reception, that is causal and fun with games like cocquet and boccee ball as the entertainment.

This board has all the fun summer colours that pop and create a exciting atmosphere for all that attend.  Place red and white checkered blankets around an enclosed garden or park where guests feel welcome to mingle and sit where they please.  Use white dinnerware and lemon yellow cloth napkins for the ‘table’ setting.   Use the setting of the park or garden as your decor, no need to distract from the beauty of nature.  Have entertainment stations situated around the area so the guests feel encouraged to engage in games such as boccee.  Hang a rustic looking sign near a tree and with the words “Kissing Tree” where you can create a ‘photo booth’ type of station and have your guests take photos at the kissing tree.

Actually, I hope she goes towards a BBQ reception, how fun would it be?!!   Or maybe I’ll ’steal’ her idea and use it for our engagement party…

I admit, I’m horrible with a ritual post, I can’t do it. I’ve attempted doing something simliar to this before and eventually gave up all together. I won’t give up “Friday Wedding”, but I can’t promise that its going to be every Friday for 3 reasons.

1. Like I said above, I can’t do it, I’m a horrible blogger
2. It’s hard to keep the hype of for weddings that won’t be seen until summer/fall 2009
3. Planning a wedding is freaking overwhelming!

Sarah and Mark got engaged before Mister and I did; and I’m completely envious of their approach. Yes, our circumstances are completely different and maybe I still am that 13 year old girl at heart who can’t wait to plan her wedding, but they have managed to keep calm and take things slowly; which initally was our tactic. We’ve completely let go of it.

Sarah emails me updates, which is usually along the same lines: “I can’t wait to go dress shopping with you when I return home, and we’re not planning or looking iat planning our wedding until later this summer.” My eyes buldge and my mind starts to turn “why can’t I do this?!” She emailed me this week to say they are taking the Zen approach, (at first I thought she meant they were going to do a Zen themed wedding but she quickly corrected me) “We’re not going to get stressed about it until the time calls for it and only if necessary”.

Ugh, if she only knew the agony, the stress, and the overwhelming emotion I’ve felt in the 3 weeks we’ve been engaged. It could possibly be that the Montreal wedding market has more venues, and less brides then Vancouver does, but it feels like we are in a race with every other couple out there to get a date and a venue that we want.

I wish I could have the Zen approach however, I’m the complete opposite. I’m a bride with a mission who is searching and researching getting her hopes up and then crushed time and time again. Sometimes I wonder how much more I can handle finding out my ideal venue doesn’t exist in Vancouver or that a photographer who’s work I like have packages starting at $6,000 that don’t include travel.

I know we’ll eventually find something that feels right and we know is perfect for us.  Right now my attempt is to soak up some of Sarah’s thought process and just stay calm and carry on.  It will turn out exactly how it should.

I never knew my mind could handle so much information or be able to organize so many thoughts about so many different things. But its good to know that it can, because this seems to be my lot in life, especially lately.

I’m completing my last crazy term (read: attending 4 classes while working a full time job before the craziness of September arrives) and finishing up my final projects over the next week. I’ve finished one of the 4 classes already and it made me so happy to have one down. I was jumping all around and acting all childlike for about an hour, then it was back to doing more school work. It’s been hard to keep my mind fixed on doing school work when I know the end is so near and when I have so many other things wanting to be sorted out.

My business mind has begun reeling again. I had put my business interests aside over the past few months because I couldn’t afford to be distracted from school and I also knew I didn’t have time to work on any of the projects that I wanted to implement. But, I see a light at the end of the tunnel and I’m starting to gear up again - I honestly can’t wait. I keep on hearing Miranda’s voice in my head “You just have to do it”. It keeps me striving to make my dreams happen. I don’t want to let her down, myself down, or anyone else who has echoed those same words into my ear. So I’m making them happen, once again, a little at a time.

But for now, its back to completing my final projects.